Your tits are I can't wait for
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
