nut hugger
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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