She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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