I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
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