Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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