I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
