I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Randomize
