Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
