Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Randomize
