How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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