Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
A+ Viking dick
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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