I only kidnapped one of them. chill
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
