Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
