I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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