i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
