Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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