We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
