I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
