At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize