it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Randomize
