please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i wish my penis had a tongue
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Randomize
