Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
