On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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