batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Of course I have a pirate flag
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
