i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
