OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
just tell him i said nine months
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Randomize
