try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
