"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
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