guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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