Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
