if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
