It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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