Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
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