You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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