her vagine was all disorganized.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
