so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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