Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Im just a social blackout drinker.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
