Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Randomize