he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Randomize
