O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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