So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
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