So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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