I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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