So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
All the doctor said was why
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
