And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
