Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
