Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize