BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I'm having to shit out rocks
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