We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
