i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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