at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize