Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
